Are we doing enough?
I mean, really? Are you? Do you feel like you are?
Well, I bet you don’t. I bet not one mother, or wife, reading this right now feels like they are doing enough to keep their PERFECT home! I bet you don’t even feel like you are doing well enough to keep your “imperfect” home at this point!
Guilt is such a nasty word and it comes from everywhere. My mom can make me feel guilty no matter what age I am. I use this tactic with my own kids, and sometimes don’t realize it. But, sometimes, we bring on our own guilt. Our own guilt comes from our own feelings that we are just aren’t enough. We are constantly looking at other women and comparing ourselves to them; the way they dress, their matching belts to their bags, they’re constantly switching purses to match their outfits, their awesome shoes, and let’s not forget that their nails are ALWAYS done. The list is never ending. It’s a constant struggle for us just to keep up, and, therefore, we feel guilt for not being what we feel we should be.
It’s us always trying to keep up, not only keep up with the Joneses while living next-door, but also keeping up with the Joneses in the workplace, or the mothers that don’t work and you are still working hard every day in an office for someone else. Or vice versa. Maybe you are jealous that some of these women have been able to come out into the workforce after being at home for years and have a career now.
Comparison is everywhere, it’s in our daily lives, in every moment, and that is where our guilt comes from. We need to give our own self “Grace”.
Just as we give others grace we need to be able to accept Grace and know that we try and do the best that we can and sometimes we mess up. The truth is we’re all doing the best we can at this thing called motherhood and womanhood. It’s a journey and it takes lots of learning. We are just imperfect women trying to live a perfect life in our home, our family, our work, friends, neighbors, well, let’s just say, with everyone around us.
Here is what one of my favorite speakers has to say about us putting ourselves second, third, behind the scenes cause we feel like we have to do EVERYTHING, and then sacrifice.
We need to give ourselves permission to be imperfect tonight, to be five places at one time, to not be “all that” but allow ourselves to be perfectly imperfect and know that we are doing the absolute best that we can.
How can we improve? What is our motivation to want to improve?? Our children. Yes, them, once again!
The most powerful way to teach your children how to enjoy life is to let them see you enjoy yours and then they can do the same. Well, my quick answer is that, “I am doomed there, and so are they”! But now, I do have a NEW goal to work towards. Really aiming to live my life intentionally each day instead of “reacting” to life’s issues. I do hope that I can make these changes and that my husband and my kids will see the difference. If I feel better about myself and MAKE the time to do so, it will show! I will get RID of the guilt and take care of me!!
Here’s more on this topic! Neglecting Your Responsibilities – YOU
Let’s stand together and support one another and stop the MOM/WIFE guilt. We need to constantly fuel ourselves to keep us happy! It’s ok! Give yourself permission!
Loving you and ALL that together we CAN accomplish when we just let go of the guilt! Feel the love for yourselves! !
I came across this article and I think it’s important that we remember that they our children are always watching, no matter what age. I am sure we had our opinions on our own parent’s marriages, and know exactly what we wanted to take from them and mimic in our own marriage, and what we definitely did NOT want to mimic.
Now that we are approaching the times when we see our sons and daughters getting married we can only pray that we have been good role models for them through the years! Maybe it’s time to take a moment and examine your relationship? Check out these 10 characteristics below, how many do you and your husband demonstrate?
10 ACTIONS THAT KIDS LEARN FROM THEIR PARENT’S MARRIAGE – by Doug Fields
When I speak on marriage, I’m always asked if I intentionally taught my kids about marriage.
The answer is yes… and, no.
Yes, there are times when we’ve talked specifically about marriage (either ours or ones that our kids have observed). But, for the most part, Cathy and I have been wise enough to know that our kids are constantly watching and learning from us. Our actions (both good and bad) are always teaching them about marriage.
I would be thrilled if my kids had a similar type of marriage that Cathy and I share… it’s definitely not perfect, but we’re both very proud of what we’ve developed over 30 years.