Sure, I’ve done part my part in the world wide web of social media! I have liked and now LOVED my share of photos and left plenty of well-meaning comments, thrown around an array of emojis and shared my fill of inspirational quotes. I have been connected, to say the least. But, sadly, I haven’t experienced much life hanging out with my girlfriends this year; and it’s left me feeling a little lonely and frustrated. I noticed that I have backed off from Facebook a bit, along with the other social media sites as well.
In a world overloaded with tweets, texts, and selfies we keep our heads down, eyes glued to our phones, afraid if we don’t, we’ll miss out; when all the while (ironically) we’re missing out on the very world around us. I mean, people don’t actually go out to dinner and just have a good one on one conversation anymore, do they? My husband and I used to laugh, as I am sure you did, that when we were able to get out to dinner by ourselves, we spent the night talking about our children. Now, we both will pick up our phones and talk about what’s on social media.
Whether we like to admit it or not, social media, overall has taken a toll on our relationships—particularly our friendships. That’s not to say that social media is pure evil, it’s just that Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat and the like have forever reshaped the way we relate to one another. Gradually, it seems social media has altered the parameters of friendship, and frankly, it’s sad. In looking back over the past year, 8 years that I have been on Facebook, I’ve discovered six areas where social media is wreaking havoc on our friendships.
It Creates a False Sense of Intimacy
Social media makes us feel like we know people better than we really do. True, we are caught up in their lives, well, the portion they want you to see. So, let’s
get one thing straight: Liking someone’s photos on Instagram does not make a friendship genuine relationships take time and communication—preferably face-to-face.
Lasting friendships are built on far more than a Facebook history. They’re forged in the fire of life’s peaks and valleys. They’re held together by more undocumented memories than documented ones, and these are known as the sincere moments. The intimate moments shared between friends.
It’s only in our mess, in our brokenness, when we can become fully known. The friends who know us best are those who have seen us at our worst — and loved us any way.
While social media may help us keep up with friends—especially those who live far away it can’t replace personal communication and shared experience. You can only intimately get to know someone through spending time with them in person, not solely online.
It Fosters Illusions of Community
Continue reading “Social, but oh so lonely!”